Fat Tuesday?

     I am sorry I messed up the dates....its not Fat Tuesday yet:

Okay so last year on this day...I was totally wild with lots of Mardi Gras beads and a fun outfit and very drunk.  Today a year later....I am sitting at a desk in Center City on hold with Apple Vacations, eating Mentos and wishing I was drunk.  I definitley have changed in the past year.  I did somethings no one would be proud of.  But days like today when I flash back and think about the actual decisions I made I feel a lot of regret.  I guess regret is just a part of my life.  I think it's so funny when people look back and say "I wouldn't change a thing about my life".  Ummm...me I would change a lot.  So many mistakes that have made that truly hurt me and others.  But don't get me wrong I am a good person and I have don't a lot of good.  I really believe in karma and treating others well. 

  Working in the city I always give money to the homeless men and always try to do at least one good deed of the day.  But one thing that is reassuring to me is that no matter what your life is like now....a year later it could be totally different.  Life is really funny.  Not in like hysterical I am gonna laugh about it but funny in the way it works.  I will never understand two things: life and men.  Those two things I will never fully understand.  But the thing is if you really think about, its the simplicity of of both of them is what makes it hard to understand.  Life is simple, try your very hardest to be happy with what you have and if not change it.  And men...where do I begin?  The are simple...thats it.  Non emotional, non dramatic, easy going, care free pain in the asses.  

       Honestly, what I might do when I get home is take out my beads from last year for one last party and make myself a fruity drink, you know for sentimental purposes.  Sounds like a plan. 

6:00 PM - Feb. 21, 2006 - post comment

karma...

it's amazing that u mention karma. i've been a firm believer in it for awhile. like u i always try to help out the homeless whenever i can. we're always changing and evolving and i think its kind of useless dwelling in the past. learn by our mistakes and try not to repeat them is my philosophy. i've done alot of crappy stuff in the past.. but am trying to do a better job during the present. bleh i talk too much so better shut my mouth. lolz. have a wonderful day tara!
- Chol

4everlostnalone - 12:18 PM - Feb. 22, 2006

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