Something about hate.

Posted on Dec. 7, 2005 at 08:59 - Post Comment

Usually I am a very nice, kind and friendly. Most people say I am pure soul. Frankly speaking I find no reason not to believe them. I suppose it is hard to find someone who hates me. And I also dont have reasons to hate someone. Well... Sometimes i hate my sister but it is not the same . I dont hate anyone except one person. He is the only one who makes me feel depressed and helpless. When i say 'he' i mean my stepfather. My mother married him when i was 3 years old and my sister 3 months. Actually i didnt know he is not my father for long. When i was 10 i was told that but it didnt matter for me. I was glad to have a father especially when some of my friends didnt have one. I called him "dad" and was happy. Today i dont call him at all and wish he vanishes from my life. The fact is he is an alcoholic. And it sucks. He is not a quiet alcoholic he is quite active - i can say violent with all inevitable consequences. And these consequences are really awful. First of all for his family. And his family are we. When he is not drunk he doesnt disturb anyone - i mean he has his life, we have our. But yesterday began the usual phase of being drunk for months. It makes me cry!!! The very "good" life is waiting for me in this month. I hope i will cope with it.

I never spoke about it with my friends they are sure i dont have problems in life at all. Remember i am "pure soul". But today i wanted to share my feelings with somebody, and i shared it with my blog. Actually i wanted to tell about it to one of my friends but he is not online today, so i wrote it here. 

:-))

Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 7, 2005 at 20:55-Link

You are a pure bliss for me. Sometimes, I wonder "how come nice people, like you, are still living in this world??"

yours always,
You know me, I know you!