Loneliness in the Net (part3)

Posted on Aug. 7, 2006 at 15:04 - Post Comment

Fragment 2

She has never read something like that before. And probably she never will. Conversation with a woman, who has gone. Left him. Asked to forgive. And he did, but he never could forget her. And was writing letters. For her. Every day. As if she were. No regrets. No complaints. Questions without answers. Questions to the answers she never asked but he did it instead. Mails, sent from New York, Boston, London, Dublin. But more often from Munich.

Letters for a woman who is not reading them. Full of tenderness and care. Thrilling stories told to the most important person. Never complaints, never offences. Only sometimes something like veiled request or better to say prayer. Like in those email from Vrozlav, sent right before Christmas from his brother’s computer:

Wrapped up a present for you. Will lay it together with others under the Christmas tree. I want it so deeply that you could open and I – see how happy you are.

The last message was # 294. It was sent on January, 30 from Munich. And it was like a cry from the heart. Yakub wrote:

Why are they all leaving me? Why?

Find me.

Like you did a year ago.

I ask you, find me. Save me!

………………………………………………………………………………………….

Tomorrow she will call, like promised. She will tell her that Yakub forgave. It is better so. And it is the truth also. But the Truth is such a general concept…

……………………………………………………………………………………………

The second time he came to Christmas. Christmas in Poland with his brother. It was amazing. It was snowing. And they went to the church. And he prayed… for this sadness to go away. And the fear too.  Because he feared.

He wrote her. Nothing changed. He wrote every day. E‑mail like the evening prayer. Take care of yourself. Please take good care. Yakub.

…………………………………………………………………………………………...

@Epilogue

The man came to Berlin-Zoo station long before midnight. The Dresden-train passes Lichtenberg station at  4.06. So he has lots of time. He took a taxi and came to hotel “Mercury”. In the bar he ordered a red wine bottle.

He always liked Natalie Cole. For her name. And also because she told such amazing stories in her songs. Listening to her you feel, and feelings – they are the most Important. Only they are worth living.

It was a quarter before 4.  He paid. Called for a taxi. To Lichtenberg station.

Today he will meet everyone he loves.

Almost everyone.