painsPosted on Apr. 6, 2006 at 09:44 - Post CommentThe last couple of days i feel a bit better, i have no fever, but still i am very weak. i guess it is because i dont eat anything. every kind of food causes pains and they are becoming quite intensive. today i've got a piece of cheese and even that small piece made me feel miserable. the problem is that i need go home and lie down but i cant because my boss doesnt let me go, she just doesnt understand how such a young girl may have such strong pains. and i am sitting here, trying to concentrate on my work, thank god and the man (or a woman) who has invented painkillers. they still cant make my pains go away but at least they can lessen them, so i could do my job. i dont know what has happened to me, but last time i only attract all the problems and hardships. as if someone shows me that happiness should be punished (i was so happy last weeks and i still am, but it seems that someone or something decided to balance my happiness with some negative emotions and problems). you know i can go through all the trials, except for physical pains. i just cant bear it at all. my sister is an opposite, she can do it with smile, so nobody will understand that she is having some pains. but i am not like her, if i have pains it is the biggest problem because i feel so miserable and helpless and i hate being helpless. anyways enough for now, i will try to do some work.
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