Detrimental Entanglement

9:35 AM

Wake up.
Eat banana.
Put on sweatshirt.
Put on shoes.

That is what I did this morning. I didn't fret about chemistry, I didn't freak out about my hair, or make-up. I just was. I became the essence of calm. I walked into Ms. Clark's room at 7:40, five minutes before the test, sat down, and prepped. The test was handed out, I went to work.

With 15 minutes to spare and read The Last Unicorn, I turned in the test. I was alive, and I was going home.
At 9:40, I walked down the stairs of Westview, avoiding the looks of people staring at my leopard print pajama bottoms, with the knowledge of one thing.
That which, above all else, shocked me:
I had just survived my first semester of highschool.

Alright, in the name of my patron Saint, does anyone understand what it is like to love someone who the other important people in your life can't stand? Where is the fairness in that?
And you think I look like a man.
Thanks, Buddy. Knowing that they dislike you, is basically like them disliking a part of me. You're too close to be a seperate entity.
I love you too much to let you go.

It's tough... Knowing that they will always oppose this. I've always obeyed them to a certain degree, did what they expected me to... My heart feels heavy, and it's hard to breathe, because it's sinking in. Their words will always be there. Stinging.
I want to have the voice to tell you everything you mean, but I'm a coward so I'll write it instead.

There is always one person in the room that you wear your hair up for. The one who is the reason you spent 30 minutes doing your make-up. Their attention is all that you desire. Emotions that you feel cannot be put into words, yet you find yourself rambling incessantly anyways. The english language doesn't do this situation justice. You're my knight, so-to-speak, and I didn't even know I was a princess in the first place.

I must go finish watching Fantastic Four with Allyson and Jaime.
Asta.

Pi

9:12 PM - Thursday, January 26, 2006 - post comment

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