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I was a cocky( in terms of interpersonal relationshipz) naive, self righteous, and spoiled. In terms of guyz ( the ones i fell for) i was clingy, jealous, possesive, and non trusting...in terms of self..i was non decisive, non assertive...and a plain ol push over. My life used to be full of pain, but i finally said NO MORE. Thre differenc between now and then is that i finally have help.....

Be Patient.....Nov. 23, 2005

everyone tells me to be patient when it comes to love, and i'm trying i'm really trying, but i think what everyone gets confuse don with me it's not being alone right now that sucks...it's tha i feel like i'f im not even working on anything now, i won't have anything to work on in the future. I wanted to be married by  25 lol I'm 23...and not even dating anyone....blah ..if i think too much about this i'm start crying right here at my computer lol I'm a wimp hmm such a lil punk. but im getting better...well imma try to get better because obviously this whole lonely pathetic thing isn't working for me.

It jus sucks, there's so many girls out there who disrespect and mis treat their men, but yet they always seem to be the ones who get  the good ones. And then there's me....simple me who jus wants someone to love and someone to love her back, but guess wha ...I may not be patient in this area..i guess because i'm 23 and the closet thing i had to that i couldn't even hold  or kiss , or really show how deep my love ran...blah.

Of course this streams from me and Tyrus ...it's hard for me to aceept that the second cloest thing   to wha i want is over too. *sigh* Tyrus had issues tha where outside of his ex, but i just wanted to have something so badly..and i loved him..i did..and i was gonna 'work' on those things jus so i could say yes! I finally have what i want, what i've been wanting since i was 16 years old!..But nah....wrong again..and it's ok , because..in actually he would never be able to give me wha i want, but still..it's hard to let go of something that was, even if it wasn't right. Bl

So!  i decided to not focus on "finding a good guy"  cuz finding a guy isn't the prob..but a good guy who won't cheat, but also will wait til were married to have sex, doesn't smoke or drink...no kids, no baggage( im not competing for his heart) blah , i may be 45 before i find someone like tha whom the chemistry and feelings are there lol but in the meantime  i have some goals i need to have going on for myself because i also didn't want to get married before having a solid foundation built for myself..cuz hey..ish happens.. and i dun want to have to depend soley on any man. So time to pick my lil love sick azz up and get busy!

Put God First and the rest will follow...
oh and one more thing bout T, he's pretty sucky with communication..we used to have so many randomn misunderstandings lol
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RuleNov. 23, 2005
I cant forget this line from ally mcbeal, it said:
"We make all this rules in our lives of what we want in
a person and a relationship, and yet at the back of our
mind we know that the person we really want to be with,
will always be an exception to those rules"

have a great day
take care

karen
Posted by karensky06

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