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I was a cocky( in terms of interpersonal relationshipz) naive, self righteous, and spoiled. In terms of guyz ( the ones i fell for) i was clingy, jealous, possesive, and non trusting...in terms of self..i was non decisive, non assertive...and a plain ol push over. My life used to be full of pain, but i finally said NO MORE. Thre differenc between now and then is that i finally have help.....

Red Lobster, Brother's show,,, Church and other good stuff...Aug. 14, 2005

Well first i have to start with church. This morning i did NOT feel like going, i loe praise and worship, i love hearing the "message" but at our church everything seems to jus go on and on, and on...so we all(mom, myself, and david) jus kinda drifted into our own world today( we tried to pay attention, but he really lost us with the choppy message =/)
Neway, i'm writing notes for the business , and looking around the room. Tall women ...everywhere, or so it seemed. It was like God's way of telling me that i don't have it so bad. I wore 3 inch heels today, which of course made me tall, but somehting about those shoes also make me feel so sexy and attractive, anyway, im standing next to david and he's still looming over me, david is about 5'11 and a half, when i first got to church we had to stand for Praise n worship,im stanidng there still feeling like a giant,( go back to my previous entry) and i see this lady looking all short n cute standing in front of me. I know her..and to myself i think, hmm i thought she was taller. Then i think..oh i'm wearing these heels, and i peer over the row and see that she is wearing flats. For some reason, I'm really bothered by how short she appeared--halfway through the Pand W i take my shoes off, and bam, i'm exactly the same height as the woman i've been watching all service.

That's when it hit me, WTH is ur problem? lol Then i look to her left a woman wearing about 2 inch heels who's taller than her. Which means that she is above "average' height too..because when i wear heels i'm always taller than the other girls around, as opposed to the women who are STILL short when wearing heels, even when im wearing flats. Then i looked to the women to the left of the one i just mentioned and she haddd to be at least 6'0..maybe 5'11....very thin, and extremly knobby knees....but guess wha, she was praising God louder than anyone in the building, completey wrapped up in HIM opposed to silly meaningless things that she couldn't change about herself, even if she wanted to.

LeSSon Leaned...and even though i didnt get anything from the "semon" i still recieved  a very strong message from  church today.......

My Busy Day yesterday...or so it was supposed to be..hmm i think i'll make this another entry...
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