my day off

I haven't been feeling well lately, stressed, tired, worn out...i needed my vacation , and more importantly i needed this day off. I'm facing some real challenges in my life and i need to be thinking with a clear head.

I'm veryyy compassionate..in fact a lil too much and always put everyone else before me. I toyed with the idea of going into work today anyway,( the old me owuld have) because i keep thinking , " they're short, they need me" ...well...i NEED ME more then they do...and they're always short...they SHOULD hire more staff..not my problem. Besides everyone else takes off when THEY need to.

I got some things done though that needed to be done. During the work week i feel stressed and tired and nothing gets donel Between school and work i feel lost and stretched to the max.   . I get off work  with enough time to do stuff...it's just i never feeeeeeeeeeeeel like doing anything.

I don't think anyone knows how really hard it is to completely change ur whole outlook on life. To change ur  habbits and ideas, to undergo a complete transformation. Hard..but can be done..and im getting there...i'm much closer to my dreams now and it feels great.

It's hard when u have people doubting u and no real support. When ppl constantly tell u ur fine the way u are, without understanding that THEY'RE fine with me the way i am lol....that's why my faith and relationship with God is so important to me because i know it's only him who keeps me going. I've met a lot of ppl who have tried to turn me from him. So...if ur a guy or girl who wants to be my friend or to the guys want to date me, if u get in the way of  where im going in life then i have no need for u.

My day off has been full of reflecting and thinking and planning, even through some cleaning in the mix~

~Lights, camera, action baby...it's on!~