Anyway it took me nearly two years to put into prospective WHY my last  relationship had to end. He gave me valid reasons, i just at the time wouldn't accept them. I've been over it, but it wasn't til lastnight tha i really understood.( btw-thanks for letting me vent to ya D )  Life is so funny, sometimes u gotta go through  new ish  to understand the old ish that was tormenting ur soul. .

Thas why this year and the upcoming year2007 have been deemed the   years of "change" for me. I realized i need to walk away from someone  ( yes  anotha one lol)although  i shoulda been walked away from them ,  in a way timing couldn't have been better cuz this way i know WHY i have to do it and know that it's the only way i'll ever achieve my dreamz.

I dun want to do it because i dun want to be "alone"  as in no friends but that reason kept me around ppl that i knew was doing me wrong for far too long in the past.

I can't help but think about this being the  5th person i've walked away from  in the past 2 years. I miss my homie C so much man, but tha person  was really, really hurting me. It was either stay and be hurt or walk away before we began to hate each other. It's hard to be me sometimes..but..everything happens for a reason. Out of those 5 ppl, 2 i don't miss at all. And one im sooooo glad its over n done with....but..

But..it's reasons like these   that i want to be made over...to stop attracting the kind of people that i would need to walk away from in the first place.

Frienships should  overall bless you, notice i said OVERALL....

I really am a good person, very pure at heart...i used to say i wish i wasn't so loving or so caring becuz it kept causing me to be used and abused by ppl i loved.....but i was jus loving the wrong kinda ppl , things will get better, jus gotta keep going...........................

God has a place and a plan for me....and the rest of us too!