I woke up today feeling pretty good. Got up, got dressed. Had enough time to make and drink a cup of coffee. I got my coat on and headed for the door, and that was when I realized I had about .75 to my name and I had to catch the bus in 5 minutes. I was basically FUCKED. I had to go to 7-11 by something, get change, specifically ask for ones. I then missed my second bus and got to work at 9:45 instead of 8:30, jsut because I forgot to get money the night before. So that just set me off on a downward spiral to WTF land.

I am just so depressed right now over everything in my life. I really want to go home and just cry for hours but of course I have to work my 2nd job.

2006 was supposed to be different, the awful luck of 2005 was supposed to be washed down with every sip of JD and champage. But so far 2006 has offered me nothing but sickness, stress, bill collectors.... the same b.s I was hoping to leave behind.

I guess that is when myspace/music comes in. I checked my page the other day and band from CT, asked to be my friend. I checked them out. I liked what I heard. They are called Changing Directions. Their songs are raw... and sound as if recorded in a basement. I love music like this. It is so pure and so perfect. I can feel the angst, the pain, the very emotion of what they are trying to say.

check out their myspace page: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=3124633

I need a vacation from my life, just a few days to rest/regroup/replan and then come back and execute.

I didn't get my house.

so on that note, I'm out to wallow in some serious self-pity. I hope that tomorrow, Friday the 13th, is a lucky day for me, it normally is and I could really use a pick-me up.

Song: Killing Loneliness - HIM

Movie: Haggard (cause that is just how I feel)