it's 1 AM my time and i just got off the phone with my cali homegirl. it sucks that i have to kinda tell her that i can't have the same feelings for her that she has for me. i hate hurting a girl's feelings. most of the conversation was about she thinking she has to defend her actions to me and that she would never cheat if we were dating. she keeps telling me she loves me and i have to tell her that i can't tell her that i love her back. sigh... me and my stupid morals. i really wish i can be like most people and think casual sex is ok. honestly... i'm kinda proud of that aspect of my personality. lolz... a thug with sexual morals. how hilarious! i have no qualms about fawkin some dudes up but i cant have casual sex with a girl. lol @ me. sometimes i think i'm so retarded. oh wells... i still can't change who i am.

 gosh my insomnia is creeping back again. since celina broke up with me i haven't been able to sleep properly i guess since last tuesday. i hate to be turning back to the vodka again but if this keeps up any longer its gonna be affecting my work habits. now that we are short handed at the lab again, i really need to buckle down and get as much done as i can.

 watched "unleashed" with jet li earlier tonight. i was really surprised at how different the movie was for a jet li film. not as much action as i expected but all in all i thought it was a pretty good movie. now that i have alot of free time again, i'm gonna be watching alot of movies. oh yeah... couldn't resist so i watched "my sassy girl" again. damn... i miss being in love.

 take care everyone... have a wonderful day.